its me

Lamanyerr tak conteng2 kat sini kan....

ntahla...bila rasa tak conteng mesti nya ada bnda yg tak kene...mestinya ada satu rasa mcm something bad is happening. Truthfully...I am in a position yg sangat tak suka nak kerja sekarang nie....I rasa beban sangat kerja. I  rasa sgt tak hepi. I rasa mcm tak suka jmpa org kat tempat kerja. Rasa ikhlas dalam diri untuk bekerja makin lama makin pudar....i especially dun like my bosses in medical, they are all snakes, gunting dalam lipatan. I'm sorry but this is the truth page...I have make a promise to myself that this is not the place where I tell lies. Like how I did with my parents and certain people in my life. I don't care okay. I just really hate this department and I just can't wait to leave. I just hope i can pass my assessment. I rather do O&G for the rest of my life than being in medical....

Oh well I can't be one very ungrateful person right...there must be something that I really like about this life...I love the fact that I have all the love that I could ever wish for. Though it is not perfect, I am not home everyday...my sister is faraway in Kedah...I hardly talk to my girls, hardly ever hangout with Zatil and the only one who is constant on my hangout list is Hazim. Totally love him for that....seriously, though we are bestfriend and I love hanging out with him...I can't help to think that maybe I'm stopping him from having his own social life. Nothing is worst that one clingy person. I hope I'm not clingy. Love life...hmm still no luck, maybe I dun really need it yet....may be I am comfortable with my static life and its windy road....or maybe I know that there's nothing that I can do or shud do....maybe i am really believing in faith....destiny. At least I know this time...my heart as fragile as it is....I am keeping it protected. I won't let myself go thru that phase again....I won't let myself be heartbroken again....tho I think the perfect person for you is me...and you are to me, I think Allah swt know better....

I won't fight anymore. I won't force. I will just let it be...anything happen....it is for the best. At least I know....I do love you...once, with all my heart. I still care about you now...whatever happen in the future...I have no grudge against you....or fate. I'll accept it with open heart..

oh yeahh!!! FYI...I love pearl...haha randomness =P