No mood

No mood to pack barang....
No mood to face my new life...
No mood seriously....no mood at all...

 No mood to posts anythg....

With or WithOUT

Hey Bloggie...I am doin updates again....

I have been rather silent because I was having my induction in Straits Meridian Hotel Melaka from 5th - 9th July 2010 so I've been kinda busy...and for some reason my broadband buat hal so tak leh online. The induction was fine, not much that I have to say the hotel was nice, the food is great, the people...well they are okay too....tho I have to say I had a pretty rough week, too many things happen  and mostly bad....some things I can't take back and though I regret.....I have to live with it for 2 years....or the rest of my life...who knows. I am sad, but well....I guess there's nothing that I can do anymore. Just hope that things will make sense in the future, things will be okay in the future, things will be just fine....I hope and I pray.....I hope Allah swt will hear my prayers....

Btw, I'll be working in Klang. I dunno whether I've made the right choice....for now it seems like I've made the wrong one tho it still seems like the most relevant one. I just hope that I'll survive....I hope that I can be strong to face watever that may come. May Allah give me strength...I dun expect things to be easy....but I hope Allah will make my path smoother....I will try my very best. I'll try to toughened up my heart, soul, mental and also physical. May this path teach me to be more mature...

p/s I'm gonna miss everything...its sad to put everythg behind....

I'm being RANDOM. AGAIN!

Louis frm St Louis Carrie Bradshaw 

on Mr.Big ~ Sex and the City Movie 1

Do you miss him?

Everyday...

You know its weird..I haven't cried very much at all...I don't know...maybe..

maybe...you're only allowed a certain amount of tears per man and I've used mine up

********

as i say earlier...i am being random

i miss my sister

Behind the WHEEL

so...my mum's car appointed my car has arrived and well...since i have to work now, i'm also forced to drive. truthfully....i prefer to be the passenger than the driver. driving is scary and NOT fun at all...i thk i just have to get used to it.

if only i am rich enuf to hire a driver

*sigh*

What's the deal with Fie

Now is 3.20pm....my sister had just left for Sg. Petani with my parents...and I have promise myself to spend only 30 minutes on the internet as I have to start packing and all that stuff...as I have been putting off everything ever since the news of induction reached my tympanic membrane. I find it so hard to wake up this morning, I don't want to face reality. I like things the way that it is now. I just feel so comfortable. With everyone's gone and me alone in charge of the house...no more diversion....reality is...next Monday i'll be goin for induction....get the result of the hospital that i'll be posted to....in which only Allah s.w.t knows where. Maybe faraway from my parents, my family and all of my bestfriends...my sister will be in Sungai Petani....and I can only see her during Raya...which reminds me...I have to make sure I apply for my Raya holiday as soon as I know my posting. I'll have to start to depend on myself solely. Thinking of all this...make me feel a little isolated and alone....geez, I am scared, but I have got to toughened up.

>>SHOCK>>BARGAINING>>DENIAL>>ANGER>>DEPRESSION>>ACCEPTANCE ~

Yes, I think I have come to accept this like it or not I HAVE TO ACCEPT IT...so now I have to start preparing myself and stop being sooo teary eyes about it. I am stronger than this. I know.....so I have to get to work now...I've got so many things to do.... ;)

July comes with a....NEWS

As I am making this blog entry.....I am actually very very VERY sleepy already. My eyes has been begging to sleep from 10pm but I was dragged to watch "Knight and Day" (a very funny movie!!!) by my sister and my parents. So, I just got back from watching movie....well, I know I said dragged but truthfully....I am really happy to go out with  them. It was my sister's last night before she is gonna start the new semester. I really hope her semester will go smoothly and may she will claim her DL again this semester. And I hope she will find a proper place to stay. I am kinda worried about her but I have my own stuff to fuss about right now. I am really sad that I can't send her one last time before I start to work...I am so sorry Adik...you know that I love you so much kan....you have been a great company sepanjang my holiday nie...I am really glad to have you around. Missing u already :'(

This has been quite a busy week. First, I was surprise by the news that I have to go for induction next week. Yes, I was shock....cause it was not supposed to be this fast. I thought we will be called around 15 July....as it turns out I have to report for duty next Monday, 5th July. I am not trilled at all about the prospect. I still have another 2 weeks plan to complete. And here I am taking everything in... trying to compact my 2 weeks schedule to 4 days...which was a complete failure...if I have to say so. I am very upset. I don't really like it wen my plan goes wrong....Oh well,  Alhamdullilah...most of the things that I need for my induction and work has already been completed. Just that I need to photocopy some important documents, buy some essential stuff like my shower foam and shampoo and stuff, and of cause packing. My mum said, I can't make such a long term plan...it is not good...I shud just at least plan1 week ahead, because we'll never know what might happen....in a way she is right tho...we are too busy planning life, where is the fun of it? We need to be more spontaneous and taste life as it is right...I dunno, maybe I am a control freak or sumthing...Not to mentionlah kan with that Postmen drama...goshh!!! just seriously...... (O.o) 

I am really scared....I am scared that I did not get the hospital that I wanted to go. I am afraid to work. I am afraid if I can't be the good, safe, competent Muslim doctor. I am afraid that now people's life is in my hand. Anyway, I realized this week that I have so many people of whom I can depend on, who care about me...it made me see that I'm a very lucky person......kinda make me feel scared...cause people always say that there will be that calm peaceful period before the storms attack right. What if I have used up all my luck and the future awaits is just so so terrible? I noe I am being paranoid....but really, I do thk that way sometimes. I'll try to update about my holiday if I have time. But looking at things...I thk I have to do some other things first...I better go to sleep now...will try to post something more sensible tomorrow

HELLO JULY

its time for a new CHAPTER of my life

: : : GOODNIGHT : : :